Grey Hair

The family.  We were a strange little band of characters trudging through life sharing diseases and toothpaste, coveting one another's desserts, hiding shampoo, borrowing money, locking each other out of our rooms, inflicting pain and kissing to heal it in the same instant, loving, laughing, defending, and trying to figure out the common thread that bound us all together.  ~Erma Bombeck

I haven't worried much about my parents much. Just that they gouge me all the time about the things they have done to me. It is a very typical thing that parent usually do in the Philippines. But as I grow old  I realize how parents love their kids and even then they gouge them it never be a measure that they are gouging about such situation.
I grow in a young parent family, they got married at their teenage years. Raising kids with their hair darker than ever. I got a young mom mostly thought about being my older sister. I remember the time when my mom was still 25 and their are boys telling me to say "hi" to my sister. My dad was immature and inadequate to be a father of 4 then. I vividly recall the memories with his mistress in some mall here in Cebu. (If I say it again he got easily pissed off about the experience.)

As I aged,  notice the grey hair growing on my parents' forehead. Getting my father back and forth in the hospital for his hemodialysis would not be a piece of cake.  Realizing on day , oh my I am getting old, and so are they.  It is not an impeccable world. I have all my selfishness and they have theirs.  We don't get along very fine because of some issues of my education.  But I tried hard to help them even sometimes it is very unclear to see.

The other day I went to my brother's ringhop party,  I reflected my parents' greatness. They gave their love and support to us. It is not an easy journey, and we are not there yet. But as years unfold and as our great worry of my father's counted years, my brother made me realize how important my parents are. How those grey hair compelled me of giving them joy and happiness while they are here.

Fights and misunderstanding never water down a parent unconditional love for their kids. UNCONDITIONAL does not necessarily mean that parents will not pressure and demand something from their children. It means whatever the child do opposite to their will, they get angry , affected, exhausted and devastated, thus it results to shouting, castration, cursing, hitting and moving out. But still after quite a while when you back to your doorstep it seems nothing happened. They will talk to you as if you never did anything.

They blunder and thwart things but seemingly they are also learning about life similarly to what we are doing. It vexed me whenever times called me to do something especially that time is when they say it.  I am afraid I am addicted to the serum of making them happy but my brother's actions telling me "I will make them happy they are the one who did something  doting and gumpted along way not just a nobody".

My parents gave a gift of having wonderful siblings. We fight and exchange words but they never fail me to be happy whenever they are around. They have their on flaws and as well I do.

My dad flails his annoying comment most of the time. Looking at him the scary man in my past. Who is immature and incompetent as my dad. BUt above all he is man who worked abroad to set a better future for the family. He is the man  with inniative and guts to justify his actions. He is someone we call when theirare difficult things to handle.

I remembered the day when my mother announced to my dad that I need to have a COLONOSCOPY. My dad didnt understand it but he cried  and say "mura man na ug grabe nga sakit". My mom said its not a disease it is a procedure to be done. I got teary eye whenever I recall this memory. Now he is sick and we are maybe counting the years he spend with us. I am making sure he makes memories even he is mostly annoying.   He want to fight with this disease, we are planning to give him a transplant. But it takes money for us to pay such. I am afraid that  I will wake up one day , dreadful thing will happen.

Yes it happens to everyone, but the pain it would cause to our hearts will be excruciating then. Gradually, I envisage about making those grey hair wipe away with happiness on their faces. It may be and mostly material but more importantly it would make them smile every single day.

“One day you will do things for me that you hate. That is what it means to be family.” 
― Jonathan Safran Foer, Everything Is Illuminated